April 25th: The Great Wave & Fire Moon - Spring updates

There is an Italian saying that goes like this "Il potere è come il mare: ti invita a guardarlo, ma se lo sottovaluti ti trascina via senza che tu possa fare nulla". It's completely true: none of the people that were around me understood many things about me, especially my power. I lived for years with lots of love, which is the most important thing, but few people, who could tell where I was going and stood there with me. I was often alone and I loved it, because when you want something you need to want it for yourself: not for approval or support from others.

Those who stay, stay because they love you but it does not mean they will understand your vision and will want to fight for it: expect this just from your mentors and lovers and, sometimes, not even from them. This is my story and what I've learned in the past 30 years.

The red moon eclipse

Hokusai was a brilliant and crazy painter: he lived for art and often wanted to improve himself. He was such a perfectionist that, when he died, he said "If I could only live a few more years, I'd be a great painter".

I often feel a sense of restlessness when it comes to the things I want to achieve: in the past, I put my vision above everything and everyone else, and it paid off beautifully. I was able to create two models (one on sanctions and one on European tech consortia), becoming not just a Fellow for the Charlemagne Prize, but also at one of Europe's best think tanks (CEPS) by the age of 28 and, by the time I was 29, I had already obtained a contract (with very good money paid in advance and branded the book a bestseller right away) from Oscar Mondadori, who commissioned me a book to be the voice of the new generation of Italians. By then, I had already created 2 blogs (the first started at 22 in Berlin, where I was just barely getting by as a student), learnt to code, and created the cover art for my book. I had already met with matematicians expert in game theory (some of which who even had contacts with John Nash), I had top-level mentors and had found online my long-distant relative Denise Loder (daughter of Hedy Lamarr), who had become very supportive of my work like lots of other people I did not want to let down.

After the book came out last year, I should have felt happy, but I felt anesthetized by pressure: as you achieve things, they stop to matter to you, if you keep stressing about all the other goals you have. My vision boards were beautiful to watch, but difficult to keep up with and I wanted to speak about this, but felt misunderstood like with many other things. How do you become the voice of a generation, when you are giving up speaking because you fear everything you might say is not going to be correct? When you want to please everyone so much so that you start to isolate yourself?

So, I did like in a hokusai painting of the moon: I eclipsed and I loved it. After the book was out, I thought my visibility was going to inevitably increase, but I felt like it was not going to be sustainable. I did not want to be thrown into a public life that did not suit my personality: I wanted to speak only about things that mattered to me and not just to show I could say something like lots of people do. Ours is such a loud society and I love to be quiet many times. So, in the past months, I decided that my communication strategy was not going to change just because of the book: I did not want to be loud, I did not want to be over exposed, I wanted to continue to be myself. I wondered if that could have made me less powerful, if people would have appreciated me less, but I realized it did not matter to me. I wanted to be who I was and not to change for society, I wanted to have the power to influence policy makers, entrepreneurs and even government agency while still being the chill person I am and not forgetting who I was before.

Instead of over exposing myself, I went back to see the people I used to see growing up, spending more time with my family and, most importantly, with myself and my thoughts and with great surprise, I realized that was not making me less powerful, rather, it was making me relatable. Eclipsing released my fears and pressures. Everything went like a wave that hits the shore: it was brutal at first, to go back to a simpler life, but it unloked in me eventually a sense of deep relaxation which pushed me to do what I really wanted to do: instead of overthinking my book promotion, I became an entrepreneur and loved it. I started feeling like my biggest power came from within: I could still do my vision boards, but I stopped feeling oblidged by them. I did not want to please anyone anymore and did not care about breaking plans: I discovered that everything was falling into pieces anyayways this.

So my oath for this Spring is to keep envisioning the future, read about the past but, most importanlty to live in the present.

Therefore, this post is about my new philosophy more than any career updates: you can check them up on my LinkedIn and even journals, podcast and so on. If the question is what do you do for living? My answer is now I am a consultant with an international pool of clients between Europe and the U.S.. However, I am much more than that, I am a balanced person who is happy that she is following her passions. So, here are 5 things I embraced lately more than ever:

1) Quiet confidence

🌊 Empowerment is not about loudly taking power away from others, rather learning calmly to use your own.

Real confidence is about being happy with yourself and not needing to be loud. Keep your values (mine are inclusion & health promotion) as a North Star: they are going to guide you in your work, in any area (security, finance or tech in my case). As long as you are true to yourself, everything around can change and you will still feel at peace. I think ideally one should aim to be like water: it can freeze, run, but it can also stand still and still be powerful.

It's funny when people want to share everything: we live in a society that's beyond hedonistic, it's purely narcissistic at this point. I also think that too many people co-live with the "Doubting Thomas Syndrome", they dont' believe it until they see it. Stop oversharing and overthinking and just take a deep breath. I don't want to have to take a picture every time I am with a friend or a person I work with to be believed. I want my closeness with people I care for an admire to show through hints, inside jokes and shared ideas. We all have the power to tell ourselves to chill the f- out but we rarely do and this is why our world is burning now: too much ego, to little relax even for world leaders.

2) The art of growing up & independence

🗽 A statue doesn't change, but it does crumble. A person can always look in the mirror and improve to prevent from remaining the same when everything around is changing.

As humans, we should aim at never stop growing up: when you think you are perfect, that's when everything starts to fall apart. This is why I think that's super important to have values and have a vision (with goals), but it's also important to not be too worried about your goals not meeting your objectives. Sometimes the environment changes and you'll have to rethink things and even yourself, but it does not have to be a drama. Most challenges are a blessing in disguise and, if you change but keep knowing who you are and what you are fighting for internally, people will still see your light even if you are showing a new part of yourself.

Most importantly, I always put my own independence first (especially financial independence for women) because only someone who is truly free can be fully help others.

3) Good governance is a fine art

🖼️ Good governance is the art of wanting to be good to yourself first and then to the people around you, as well as society.

One thing I really liked about studying politics is that you can really apply what you learn in real life: in particular, I think governance is not just a government's thing. Learning to deal with our own power is as important as understanding the power we have as a society. This is why I keep trying, even with many different work projects, to find some time for the causes I really care about. To me it's more important sometimes to speak pro bono about youth inclusion, cyber bullying and women empowerment in tech rather than having another work project just for profit, though money makes the world go round (quoting Rihanna here hehe).

4) Going with the flow

🗾 Being seen as crazy sometimes is just about being healthy in a sick society.

In the past months people (including my past self ahah) expected me to turn into full-author mode and to go around presenting my book. I disobeyed to everyone, including my own brain (which by the way is probably the most difficult client I'll ever consult because it switches very quickly). In the middle of my book promotion decided that the moment was right to do instead something else: setting the basis for my entrepreneurial journey. Was it rational? No. Did it make me happy? Yes very much, like all the other times I rebelled in my life.

In 2025 I had spent a year writing full time the book Mondadori asked me to write and, by the time that it needed promotion (for which I worked way too much as an author given that their idea was to just dump even extra organizing work on me as I was a young writer) I was bored of that job. I wanted to do everything but talking about my book around in festival: I missed tech, I missed economics. The only thing that I wanted to keep working on my book was my art as this was a field where I had never been really active. This is why in the past months I started going to museums more and thinking about my next artistic moves, next my consulting roles in the field of math / AI / XR / quantum.

It was very random for me to do this but it kept my fantasy stimulated and I do not regret this at all.

5) The Great Wave

💦🧊🐧 Don't ever underestimate the power of others to change things and, most importantly, your own.

Know your limits, know your boundaries and say them out loud. Do not conform just to please others, to be liked or seen. You need to believe in yourself first and only then you'll be able to believe in others.

I started a blog just to write down my thoughts and it turned out to become an Oscar Bestseller just because others saw themselves in my thoughts: as humans, we are more similar then you think.

Unfortunately, I see a lot of people trapped in their own need to be liked and self-doubt: this way, one can only act negative towards others, because they do not trust their intuition. Once you trust your ideas, that's when you realize that they can work. not only for you, but also for others. If your ideas are random like mine, follow them instead of suppressing them to make others and your future self happy. Your future self won't care about how much money you make today or who you know today, they will only care about not having regrets in your past.

Today is liberation day in Italy and even World Penguin Day: I think that penguins should be an example. They move through water and ice like it's the same thing: they don't care about looking goofy and are also very gender equal with the male looking after the eggs. Be like a penguin: care less, be happier and you'll be free. Focus more on the beauty of life and to the beat of your own heart (Justin Bieber and Nicki Minaj would maybe say "All I need is a beauty and a beat" and they are absolutely right).

PS: And, finally, print your best pictures and put them on a vision board without caring about sharing all the time. I believe that not sharing is caring at this point in time in history.

Love,

Elena